Why are we faking it?
I was at one of the outlets of an international coffee chain in Bangalore this week to meet a friend and discuss a new and exciting project.
After we settled down and got discussing, we decided to order our beverages. It was late morning and both of us had had our breakfast. I went in and ordered a double chocolate something and he ordered a cappuccino, I think.
Customer feedback
I was called in when the order was ready. We got our beverages, straws and some sugar. I saw some cream floating on my beverage and requested for a spoon. I was given a stainless steel spoon by the staff.
As we settled down again and resumed our discussions, I noticed a layer of white particles on the spoon. I wiped it with my thumb and I instantly knew what it was – detergent residue. My eyes have been trained – we have a maid at home who is in a tearing hurry, sometimes.
I went back to the counter and spoke to the cashier and handed over the spoon. He immediately looked at it, quickly apologized to me and gave me a fresh spoon. I came back and we resumed our work.
Fake drama – is it appropriate?
As I was driving back home after the meeting, I recalled an incident in New Delhi at another outlet of the same chain. It was evening time and I was with a friend. We suddenly heard a couple of young men shouting at the cashier. The reason: they had specified ‘no ice’ but the beverage was served with ice. There were several customers at the outlet and everyone’s attention was focused on the growing altercation. One thing led to another and one of the young men went out and when he returned, he was joined by more young men. Everyone in the group was shouting at the cashier and the staff.
Meanwhile, the manager came out from behind the counter and tried to pacify the group. I saw him being heckled and pushed around. The young men were demanding ‘compensation’ for the ‘hurt’ caused. I saw the manager taking the group ‘leader’ out of the cafe and speaking to him separately. After a few minutes, the ‘leader’ came back into the cafe. He spoke to his group who seemed to be waiting for ‘further instructions’ and they left immediately thereafter but not before shouting a warning at the staff. Once they were out, I saw them laughing and back-slapping. It was a well-orchestrated drama to get some ‘benefits’.
Where is our moral compass?
I have observed this as a trend. Wherever public attention is assured, ‘aggrieved’ people tend to go on overdrive with their drama. If it is an airline or a 5-star hotel, they are probably hoping for an upgrade. In a coffee chain, they may end up getting a complimentary voucher. A decent restaurant could offer them a waiver of the bill.
I wonder if we are becoming like those beggars on the city streets, the ones who evoke pity in us by displaying bloodied bandages or a painful limp. However, once they are ‘off-duty’, the bandages come off and the limp disappears.
In this process of faking and exaggerating emotions, are we ending up becoming someone else? Isn’t some residue from these exaggerated emotions likely to reside in us forever?
Isn’t this habit of trading emotions and drama for benefits likely to fundamentally damage the moral compass that is located somewhere deep within us?
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So true, Ramanan. Also, what is the difference between the beggar on the street and these individuals!?! Yes there are some genuine cases but you don’t have to become someone else there is always an amicable way out.
Thank you, Shanker!
Well, you just described “Trolling” in this age of Twitter.
I however have an alternate take on this Ramanan. I don’t think we need to worry about people losing (or altering) their true self when they pretend to be someone else. I think behavior stems from natural thinking. We can’t say that someone who acts in an opportunistic manner will eventually become an opportunist. S/he acts that way coz s/he “is” an opportunist. After all, our behaviors are a mere reflection of our thoughts, aren’t they?
Good point, Siddharth!